I was headed yesterday for the basement of the French Hospital Medical Plaza (with a name like that, they should have a Vegas floor show) and was waiting for the elevator doors to open. When they did, there was a young woman about twenty-five and about four months pregnant. I didn’t expect to see that. I could feel the smile start to spread across my face because she was so beautiful. Our eyes met and she smiled back. I was there for a cardiac test, and I could feel my heart, feel that little flush of pleasure that flooded it, that moment we all feel when we are happy. I was still smiling at the receptionist’s window.

I was thinking about Siena, a former student of whom I am very fond, who is just now expecting her second child (the first is a beautiful little blond girl). Siena reminds me of a quote from a Steinbeck short story: “God, a kid of hers is going to have fun!”

Part of recovery from alcoholism, I’ve discovered, involves re-wiring your brain, which, in most cases, including mine, has inside of it a voice with a megaphone that tells you insistently that you are a bad human being. I got one wire rewired yesterday at the elevator doors. We need to learn, as the old song goes, to accentuate the positive and part of that involves periodically stopping for a moment for recognizing–and articulating– those things that make us happy.

So here are some of mine, in no particular order and several hundred more should be on the list, but I had to limit myself. You don’t need a War and Peace blog entry.

1. Seeing a young mom-to-be when the elevator doors open.

We were asked today in group to name something that made us happy. I said


2. Seeing babies in the grocery store.

Here are some more, and I didn’t say this was going to be profound:

3. Dogs, of course. And puppies, especially these breeds, Basset Hounds, West Highland White Terriers, Irish Setters, and all of the Pound Puppies we’ve adopted. All of them have been important to my life. Seventy-one years of unconditional love.


4. Learning about my ancestors:


5. Friends.


6. Family. My boys and of course Elizabeth. Here we are in the 2022 Arroyo Grande Christmas Parade.


7. Food. Three favorites. I forgot butternut squash ravioli. Mmmm, hash browns.


8. Fields of sunflowers in Tuscany or Umbria, with a medieval town atop a hill every ten miles or so.


9. Baseball. These are the 1934 St. Louis Cardinals, the “Gashouse Gang.“


10. My nieces.


11. Writing.



12. World War II airplanes.

13. Cats.

14. Branch Street.

15. Music. This one, by Florence and the Machine, is five years old but I just discovered it, and a good thing, too. It’s about addiction.

… At seventeen, I started to starve myself
I thought that love was a kind of emptiness
And at least I understood then, the hunger I felt
And I didn’t have to call it loneliness

… We all have a hunger
We all have a hunger
We all have a hunger
We all have a hunger

… Tell me what you need, oh, you look so free
The way you use your body, baby, come on and work it for me
Don’t let it get you down, you’re the best thing I’ve seen
We never found the answer but we knew one thing

… We all have a hunger (we all have a hunger)
We all have a hunger (we all have a hunger)
We all have a hunger (we all have a hunger)
We all have a hunger (we all have a hunger)

… And it’s Friday night and it’s kicking in
In that pink dress, they’re gonna crucify me
Oh, and you in all your vibrant youth
How could anything bad ever happen to you?
You make a fool of death with your beauty, and for a moment

… I thought that love was in the drugs
But the more I took, the more it took away
And I could never get enough
I thought that love was on the stage
You give yourself to strangers
You don’t have to be afraid
Then it tries to find a home with people, or when I’m alone
Picking it apart and staring at your phone

… We all have a hunger
We all have a hunger
We all have a hunger
We all have a hunger

… Tell me what you need, oh, you look so free
The way you use your body, baby, come on and work it for me
Don’t let ’em get you down, you’re the best thing I’ve seen
We never found the answer but we knew one thing

… We all have a hunger (we all have a hunger)
We all have a hunger (we all have a hunger)
We all have a hunger (we all have a hunger)
We all have a hunger (we all have a hunger)

… And it’s Friday night and it’s kicking in
In that pink dress, they’re gonna crucify me
Oh, and you in all your vibrant youth
How could anything bad ever happen to you?
You make a fool of death with your beauty, and for a moment
I forget to worry

Not a bad list to start with, I think.